by Jen Roberts
From Marsden to Ilkley – via poetry, painkillers, and puddles.
On the 7th June, I (along with a couple of other Ilkley mums) took on the Stanza Stones Ultra — a 50-mile race starting in Marsden, at the northern edge of the Peaks, finishing in Ilkley. The route winds its way across the moors, passing all the ‘Stanza Stones’ — a series of poems by Simon Armitage that he graffitied into some rocks and then dumped in hard-to-find spots across the moor. The route also takes in a few other literary landmarks, including Mytholmroyd (birthplace of Ted Hughes) and Haworth (birthplace of some famous women).
For those who know me, this was a surprising race choice — not so much because of the distance, but because, as my mum so graciously put it, “You’ve got less culture than a pot of yogurt.”
In an effort to prove her wrong, I decided to do a bit of pre-race prep on the poems. Most of them, I quickly discovered, are rather bleak — lots of rain, puddles, and mist. So, I gave up. But I did come across one absolute gem in the Stanza Stones anthology entitled “Lady Gaga Visits Pule Hill.”:
Chased by wolves
Across the moor
In a top notch beef dress.
Two days later,
Sadly,
There is nothing left.
(Poppy Turner)
Race Day
Anyway, running. Race prep had not gone well. I’d spent the week preceding the race in France and Germany during which I made a good stab at eating twice my body weight in cheese and kebabs. Coupled with this, I’d had a really sore Achilles, which had become so bad that I’d actually paid to see a physio! So my best case scenario was just finishing the race – but at least I’d have a couple of Ilkley friends to keep me company. So I packed my bag expecting to be out for at least 13 hours.
Early Navigation Wobbles
On the day of the race, with a still-sore foot, I popped half a packet of Ibuprofen and crossed my fingers. Weather for the day was pretty good for running – light showers, not too much wind. It was quite a small race (about 100 runners) and it became abundantly clear early on that very few people knew the route (myself included). Less than 5 km in, I took a wrong turn and carried on for a good couple of minutes before realising my mistake. Doubling back, I rejoined the back of the race – much to the amusement of my Ilkley mums. This became a bit of a theme, with two more mistakes within the first 20km.
Into the Groove
But once the race nerves settled, things starting going better. The nav got easier and I found that I was able to bridge the gap to runners ahead of me. The course was (for the most part) extremely runnable – it’s only 2,000m of climbing over 50 miles, and consisted of lots of flat sections along reservoirs and drainage ditches punctuated by brutally steep (but mercifully short) climbs out of the valleys.
The rest of the race passed fairly uneventfully. The miles ticked down at a steady rate and my foot held up (ibuprofen really is a wonder drug!).
Moorland Stand-Off
The only event of note was a stand-off I had with some gamekeeper as I headed up onto Ilkley Moor who accused me of scaring one of his puppies, and got increasingly more irate when I wouldn’t ‘stand still!’ to let his dog (who had long since bolted) pass – clearly we had slightly different priorities!
When I got to the finish I was amazed to find I was first woman – having got lost so many times, I just assumed there were plenty of people in front of me – and even more surprised to hear that I had taken the women’s record by more than an hour!
My Stanza Stones Summary
My verdict of the race…
Chasing pups
Across the moor
In a faded NLFR vest.
Nine hours later,
Sadly,
No toenails are left.
